Wednesday, June 25, 2008

Bats in the Belfry

If ever we needed a man. There are some instances where we strong, independent women make this statement. We headstrong women convince ourselves we don't need a man and some of us don't want one. However, there comes a time when we not only want one but need one.

A friend of mine had a bat in her house last night and it scared her half to death. Instead of trying to kill it or chase it out with a boom, she ran in her room, looked the door and jumped on the bed. She called me in frantic mode as she sat rocking back and forth holding herself. I laughed but felt for her at the same time. Where are the men when you need them? A man could have taken care of this instead of her calling 911 to have the Fire Department come and kill the bat. There's A Bat in my House...remember that from Hollywood Shuffle? Actually, they didn't kill the bat but threw it out the window. As the Fire Dept. did their thing, my girl stood on her table shaking like a leaf. She was talking so fast and breathing so hard. I felt so sorry and helpless. I can see it now, my girl standing and screaming in the room as the bat roamed the living room like he paid the rent this month, screaming, "Where are all the men when I need them?"

So after much contemplation, I finally got the are there to kill those bats, spiders, roaches and rats etc., that sometimes plague us. Let me not forget to mention my other friend's trouble with the Diamond Back Rattle Snake. They are there to hang the shower curtain when it falls, the blinds when they come down ( Samantha, Sex and the City), and move in the new couches when we don't want to pay for delivery. They are handy when the pipes are clogged, the light bulbs need changing and when the car breaks down. Honorable mention: The flat tire needs changing. They are also there to comfort us when we are upset instead of us nursing a bottle of alcohol because we can't stop shaking after the damn bat inhabited the house. My girl was contemplating sleeping in a hotel last night. I wonder if she did. A man could have shut this whole disaster down. Only problem would be if the man were afraid of the bat too. Damn.

No comments: