Tuesday, April 29, 2008

Commercials We Love


Name that Commercial…

1. Five, Five Dollar, Five Dollar Foot Long!
2. What is the inverse of Jan. 3? Answer: September 19th.
3. Uh, my car broke down up the street. I need to come and use your phone.

4. So Easy, Even a Caveman can do it!
5. Look 36 just put braces on his boy!
6. Hey, I need some of those cushiony NBA Socks for my footsies
7. Life comes at you fast.
8. In my Toyota Corolla, So Fresh
9. Priceless
10. It.
11. It’s the choice of a new generation
12. Who you calling cootie queen you lint licker!
13. Phylicia, those are her whites in the dryer.

Are these commercials really helping these companies sell their products or are they just must see tv for the consumer? With the economy being in such bad shape as it is, my guess is that they’re pure entertainment. We like to follow story lines and chronical the lives of characters. Remember the Taster’s Choice Commercials with the two neighbors falling in love? What ever happened with them anyway? We love the catchy little tunes and beats (F R E E, That spells free credit report.com baby) and if they make us laugh, we’re hooked. But we aren’t hooked on the products, just the commercials. Don’t believe me? Let’s test it: Did you run right out and switch your car insurance to Geico because you fell in love with the Cavemen? Probably not. I did however get a caveman, sunvisor in Gamecock colors. I do love watching to see what they will do next. The disco caveman is too funny to me, the show was crap though.

Did you go out and buy a Serta mattress to get rid of the counting sheep? I think not. Do you shop exclusively at Macy’s because that’s where the stars are? Who can afford to? By no means am I saying that commercials never work. I truly believe in product placement and brand recognition. What do you think of when you see a black and white cow? However, we can’t always take advantage of these outstanding products because of lack of funds to spare. So we are truly entertained by the comic relief they bring but the company’s 4th quarter projected sales suck. Thus Economic Stimulus! Hmmm! Millions of dollars spent to make us spend money we don’t have.

Does this mean the companies should cease from making brilliant commercials? H no! What would we talk about the Monday after Superbowl Sunday? Plus, I have to admit. I’ve had my share of $5 footlongs! I can bring home the bacon, fry it up in a pan… you get the idea!

1. Subway
2. Netflix
3. Orkin
4. Geico
5. Serta Mattresses
6. T-Mobile
7. Nationwide
8. Toyota
9. Mastercard
10. Ebay
11. Pepsi
12. Orbitz
13. Cheetos

Sunday, April 27, 2008

The State of the World Today

In these days and times, the economy has reached an all time low or high depending on how you look at it. The Government is issuing Economic Stimulus Checks this week in the hopes of correcting some of the problems. But will this help? The number of well paying jobs, available healthcare to working class individuals and savings accounts are at an all-time low. Affordable housing, offers of low interest rates on loans and mortgages and community resources are scarce.

Taxes, services, and unemployment rates are soaring through the roof. Gas is almost $4.00 a gallon for regular, Grocery shopping is like paying a car note and the price of stamps has almost doubled. Almost .50 for one stamp? Are you kidding me? Credit card limits are super high with the credit card companies banking on the fact that we will need the money and not be able to pay it back thus owing them our first and maybe second born. Stress, sickness, and crime are steadily on the rise and divorce rates have peaked. Why? The economy. Does this sound like problems 3, 6, or 900 dollars per household can fix? Most of us will save the money for those ever emerging “Rainy Days”. Very few of us will put the money back into the economy.

The Bush Era has totally destroyed this country and our credibility. The self-esteem of the working class is dwindling because they cannot provide for their families. There is nothing worse than feeling inadequate and less than a man or head of your household when you work everyday and hard because you do not make enough to pay all your bills. This is even true with multiple income families.

Ask a young lady what’s going on nowadays and her response is “Ain’t nothing going on but the rent.” Quite a comical song but a true one, which by the way was made in the 80’s when we were in a huge recession. My parents were both laid off and my sister was just a month old. Which again coincidentally a Republican was in office (Regan and BUSH, Sr.) In the New Jack City Era it was remixed “For the love of Money, people will steal from their brother, For the Love of Money, people will rob their own mother. People don’t let money change you.” In today’s time Players are singing “You know it's hard out here for a pimp. When he tryin to get this money for the rent. For the Cadillacs and gas money spent. Because a whole lot of bitches talkin s**t. Has it gotten that bad? Oh yes. So what are we to do besides get 2nd and 3rd jobs and move strangers into our homes to split the rent? There is no Robin Hood to steal from the rich and give to the poor. So what do we do?

Unfortunately, I don’t have the answer because I’m in the same boat with 90% of working class Americans. I often cry myself to sleep at night worrying about how I’m gonna make ends meet. As soon as I think I’m ahead, that dag blasted Time Warner Cable will call. I’m often asked by others, “Where’s your faith in God?” I usually co-sign this kind of optimistic thinking and ask the question of myself. “God always makes a way,” I say. “He didn’t bring me this far to leave me.” “I didn’t survive surgery and post-op complications to be thrown away and beat down.” Truth is, we all face hardships and it is getting harder everyday. Sen. Barack Obama was right when he said working class members cling to their religion and guns, because I just expressed my belief in God and his ability to bring me through.

None of us knows what the future holds. We can only hope for the best and try our best to make it. We must plan our lives to the best of our abilities, set goals and strive to meet them. God will bless our efforts. Pray for me and I in turn will Pray for you!
Peace and Blessings.

Friday, April 25, 2008

Song For Me

I'm a train wreck in the morning.
I'm a bitch in the afternoon.
Every now and then without warning
I can be really mean towards you.
I'm a puzzle yes in deed.
Ever complex in every way.
And all the pieces aren't even in the box.
And yet, you see the picture clear as day.

I don't know why you love me
And that's why I love you
You catch me when I fall
Accept me flaws and all
And that's why I love you

I neglect you when I'm working
When I need attention I tend to nag
I'm a host of imperfection
And you see past all that
I'm a peasant by some standards
But in your eyes I'm a queen
You see potential in all my flaws
and that's exactly what I mean.

I don't know why you love me
And that's why I love you
You catch me when I fall
Accept me flaws and all
and that's why I love you

lyrics by Beyonce Knowles
(Flaws and All)

Thursday, April 24, 2008

Beauty is in the Eye of the Beholder

In today’s society, men and women alike place a lot of emphasis on looks, body type, hairstyle, fashion sense and complexion. Whether or not a man or a woman is attracted to the opposite sex is usually based on one or more of these attributes, at least initially. Models are getting thinner, plastic surgery is running rampant and high fashion has made its way into the mainstream. It’s all about Couture, Botox and Gastic Bypass. What we see on television only perpetuates this mentality. Shows like Extreme Makeover, The Swan, What Not To Wear, Dr. 90210 etc. all tell us we need to change in order to fit into the current perception of Beauty, which is thin, flawless, dressed to kill, and super sexy. This pretty much makes it impossible to truly get to know someone if they do not physically fit this stereotype. However, what you may consider road kill may be someone else’s king or queen. “Everyone has their own definition of Fine”, I always say.

Let’s take me for example. Growing up, I was always the fat girl with the big lips and acne. My so called friends treated me as such and let’s not mention the fact that I was virtually invisible to the boys. Well not invisible, they made fun of me from time to time. Yes, this hurt and yes it damaged my self-esteem. It wasn’t until college that this pain started to subside when I found myself in unfamiliar territory. A young man started to pursue me and changed the way I viewed myself. However, when he decided to leave me for another, he left me wondering, “What’s wrong with me?” Suddenly, all those feelings of inadequacy came flooding back again. It wasn’t until I graduated, got a place of my own and took on an independent attitude that I started to view myself differently once again. I realized that I was a hot commodity and any man would be lucky to have me. I had it going on. I had a good job, car, Bachelors and Master’s Degrees. So, why was I so unhappy? I would go out dancing with girlfriends and they would get all the attention. Men basically looked at me like I had the plague or something and I thought I was on my best game. But then again, people aren’t automatically attracted to everyone they meet. That doesn’t mean you have the right to be unkind to them, It just means that everyone won’t like you and you don’t have to like everyone who does.

It wasn’t until I found myself in the company of men who appreciated the fullness of my lips and hips, the thickness of my thighs and the curves of my calves that I started to truly feel sexy. They appreciated the smoothness of my shoulders and the pretty way my freshly painted toes rocked a pair of sandals. They liked the length and thickness of my hair and the way it played peek-a-boo with my neck. I was told I was Fine As Hell and I’d never heard that before. I got requests to let them stare at me in my swim suit and to wear heals and short skirts to show off my assets. No, my essence wasn’t for sale and no I didn’t put my body on front street, but I definitely got noticed by more than one man and that was very flattering for me, not to mention it bolstered my self-esteem. It was because of this that my true personality was revealed and these men were pr ivied to it exposing my greatest beauty of all, my heart. Is it that I suddenly shed the ugly ducking skin or did I find the puzzle or puzzles looking for the missing piece? I think the latter. Monique said it best, “Go out and find you a fat chaser and have a good time!” Meaning, don’t spend your time pursuing someone who finds you repulsive.

What I’m saying is there is always someone for everyone regardless of looks. One man’s trash is another man’s treasure. One woman’s frog is another woman’s prince. You get the idea. Now, by no means am I saying don’t be on you’re A Game. I’m saying do what feels good to you and always look your best, but don’t feel you have to be a size 6 to be sexy or have to have hair down your back to be noticed. Be comfortable in your own skin. Don’t believe the hype. The one for you is out there. What looks good is not always good for you. But by the same token, if the thought of kissing this person makes you want to upchuck your lunch, they aren’t for you either. How will you know? Something inside you will tell you he or she is the one- this I believe and in this instance looks won’t matter.

Wednesday, April 23, 2008

And Then There Were Two

With the economy in such bad shape, the citizens of the Good 'Ol United States of America are searching for much needed change. The rest of the world hates us and our President, mainly they hate us because of him. He believes being President of the United States means being President of the entire World. He waged a war to kill someone who threatened his father in his administration which means he sacrificed the lives of our sons and daughters to carry out personal vendettas. The national deficit is so high I that the $1.00 bill is at its all time low. Some countries won't even accept our dollar cause it isn't worth the paper its printed on. Gas prices are at an all time high, health care is damn near impossible to get, daycare prices are ridiculous and Monopolies like Time Warner Cable are raping us. So unless you live under a rock literally, you are feeling the crunch of this ever worsening economy.

Most of the members of the Republican party are in higher tax brackets then the rest of the country and aren't really affected by the economy. Therefore, the price of gas isn't hurting their wallets, the war in Iraq isn't affecting them cause their sons and daughters aren't there. They are too busy spending the trust funds laid out for them. So by this logic, the Democratic Party seems to have a finger on the pulse of the ordinary, modern-day American like me. Again, unless you are living under a rock you have been pr ivied to the epic battle for the Presidential Nomination waged by Sen. Barack Obama and Sen. Hillary Clinton. These two history making candidates are in a bitter fight to the end. Both think their policies concerning health care, education, the economy and the war are what's best for the American people. But which candidate really represents change? For me, the answer is Barack Obama!

Why? Let me answer this way....Ever since I've been eligible to vote there has been either a Clinton or a Bush on the ballot. I've been eligible since 1992. Yes, when Bill was in office we had an economic surplus for the first time in a long time. The American people were able to make a decent living as though it seemed. However, Wal-mart became a major monopoly putting smaller companies and stores out of business and then they shipped most of their jobs oversees to manufacture their products putting more Americans out of work. Hillary Clinton sat on the board of Wal-Mart for 15 years. Now, don't get me wrong, I love Wal-mart and shop there almost daily, but who is really benefiting from me spending my dollars there, the American people working to manufacture the products or the Walton family? Of course the Walton Family because Americans aren't manufacturing the products, some child in China is.

No, I'm not blaming Hillary Clinton solely for Wal-mart's decisions, but I am acknowledging the part she played. Sen. Clinton has attacked Barack Obama and called him an elitist and out of touch with the American People. Who had a 129million tax return? Who was able to lend their own campaign $5million for advertising? Sen. Clinton boasts of having so many years of experience, but her husband's 8 years in the white house doesn't count towards her experience.

America is ready for true change. Sen. Obama represents this change. Who better to understand and help fix the economy than someone who actually lived it. He watched his mother succumb to cancer because she didn't have adequate health care to cover the treatments needed. He understands the plight of the single mother being that he hasn't seen his father since he was two. During his time in the Senate he has had more beneficial legislation passed than Sen. Clinton, he voted against the war in Iraq, and he's worked in the trenches with real people.

Many people believe Obama can't win against John McCain. I disagree. Americans are struggling. Even the most racist person alive( yes racism still exists) will choose to eat well instead of starving daily and having their son killed in a senseless war. With that in mind, the number of people who need change far outweighs the number of people who are privileged enough to be considered upper class. John McCain represents a continuation of the Bush Era and policies. Its time to burn that Bush down once and for all. We don't need more lies and more lives lost fighting for someone else's freedom not our own. We have people in this country being tortured, wrongfully imprisoned, starving and homeless, sick and dying, unemployed and mentally ill. We need to take care of home first before we jump so far into foreign policies.

I personally will be doing all I can to help the Obama campaign win the nomination and the Presidential Election. Can we do it? Yes, We Can!!

Tuesday, April 22, 2008

Why is Love Blinding?

A girl breaks up with her boyfriend and the very next day she sees him eating dinner with another woman. She cries and feels gut punched but quietly heals. Some months later after episode after episode, this guy drives up to the girl with the other woman in the car and speaks to her like life is all good. This girl still continues to have sex with this man and buy him things even after this guy furnishes the other woman's apartment and goes in debt over this woman. He lies to her and says he's out of town and won't return til a certain time and this girl visits another part of campus and sees this guy's car parked outside the other's place. He takes this woman on a Spring Break trip he and the on again/off again girlfriend was supposed to take together. He stood her up date after date and she still bought him a graduation gift even after he did not attend either of her graduations. Stupid right? Yeah, but the girl was in love and couldn't believe that all the things she and her guy had discussed and all the plans they made were actually all finished. Plus the sex was good so she thought.

Another girl is in college, living on campus and doing well in school. She meets a guy who is basically homeless at the time and falls quickly for him. ( Red Flag 1) He moves in with her into the dorms and basically gets her kicked out of the dorm. They get an apartment together and the drama begins. She quits school, gets a full time job to pay the bills and helps this guy get on his feet. He soon begins to take his checks to buy studio equipment as he is an aspiring rapper and other bs and she is left holding the rent bag time after time. She helps him buy a car before she gets one and is left to ride the bus to work while he drives. He doesn't let her borrow the car, but mind you her name is on the title. After years of mental and verbal abuse , cheating, using, manipulating and self esteem lowering the relationship is at its end for the 500th time and she is crying and wondering what she is going to do without him. Stupid right? Love says no.

A guy fresh out of high school falls for a young girl. Its all good in the beginning. He puts her and her wishes ahead of his and his family. Driven by emotion he leaves college and joins the military to be closer to her. All his money goes to this girl and her mother. He was basically a DAN, what I call a Dumb Ass Nigga. Argument after bitter argument, he still longed to be with her. With nose totally open, he was taken advantage of, used, abused etc. He finally woke up and realized how stupid he had been for so long and decided that he did not need this young lady and broke off the engagement. Why did it go on for sooooooo long? Love.

I've just laid out 3 scenarios of 3 actual people and their battles with the L Word. Why is it that when our heart gets involved with someone we let that person take us through hell and high water? Does giving your heart mean automatically trading in your brain and your independence? Loving someone shouldn't mean that you will take all kinds of BS from them and think that its all a part of the process. Love should not hurt us, but make us smile and feel all warm and fuzzy inside. You should long for the next time you see that person and imagine them in your personal space when they are away. You should look forward to the phone ringing and scramble to get rid of the smile on your face before you answer. The person should be able to tell in your voice how you feel about them- giggly I say. This is what love feels like, not tears and anguish, anger, resentment, loneliness, headaches and gallstones.

Have I described a fairy tale? Yes and no. I believe you should feel that way about a person you are in a relationship with but is that realistic. Yes you are going to have problems, but is expecting to be happy with someone all the time that far fetched? I was told once that marriage is an investment and not necessarily for love. So who's right? Is it that you should put up with BS in a relationship because you are living in a million dollar home and driving the Hummer you desperately wanted or should you be independent and leave if your heart and emotions are not being satisfied? "Can't feed your family with love," I've heard before. So what do you do? Follow your heart or your wallet?

So why is love blinding? Well this is my answer, feel free to offer your own opinion. Love is blinding because we yearn for so long for all of the before mentioned emotions that when we experience that we don't want to let it go. When someone makes you smile, you want more of that feeling. When they make you laugh, you want to laugh more, when they make you moan you want to moan more and louder the next time. You get so engulfed in emotion that you don't see all the stupid stuff you are doing or how you are being used. That girl he was with at the coffee shop was just a friend and nothing is happening there. That guy she was sleeping with in the bed was her childhood friend and they always slept together...totally innocent. He really needed that DVD Player with the surround sound in his bedroom so that his equilibrium would be constant. He really did need help decorating his apartment and wanted the bedroom suite you bought him, but when he took it back cause it wasn't the right color and kept the money, he really meant to give you the money back but fell on hard times.

We want the fairytale to be true so bad that we will do almost anything to get it. We go so far as to turn our backs on our friends, family, God. to be with this person. We are truly blinded to the fact that this person is an asshole leading us down the wrong path in life. Not to say that all relationships are like this..but the early ones usually are. Why? Because we don't know any better and are naive. It takes a relationship of this magnitude to open our eyes and make sure it never happens again. So, I say to all folks in love....Open your eyes people and really look. Do you like what you see?

Monday, April 21, 2008

Ursula's Bucket List

Ursula’s Bucket List - Things I want to do before I Kick the Bucket!1. Go Skydiving 2. Have Sex under a waterfall 3. Visit the Cave where they laid Jesus 4. Visit the Pyramids 5. Get a tattoo or two or three 6. Swim with Dolphins 7. Meet Michael Jackson 8. Meet Oprah Winfrey 9. Learn to Belly Dance 10. Learn to work a "fierce" Stripper Pole 11. Bungee Jump 12. Surf "The Wedge" - Huntington Beach, California 13. Get 2nd holes in my ears 14. Visit the remains of the Titanic 15. Ride a motorcycle 16. Ride a Camel 17. Take a cruise to Alaska 18. Write a puppet show 19. Produce a One Woman Show 20. Go Deep Sea Diving 21. Get Arrested in a Political Protest 22. Break a world record 23. Become a member of the "Mile High" Club 24. Witness a Western Dessert Sunset 25. Ride a horse on a beach 26. Go wind sailing 27. Spit off the Eiffel Tower 28. Bathe in the Red Sea 29. Have sex on a black sand beach 30. Go Boogie Boarding with my son 31. Snow Board from the "Big Hill" 32. Fly on Airforce One 33. Have a reality Show - cause my life is full of drama! 34. Take A nude pic 35. Climb a rock wall 36. Photograph Africa and win a Pulitizer Prize 37. Wear a Bikini and look damn good in it! 38. Run the New York Marathon 39. Shave my head 40. Ice Skate and complete a jump 41. work Kermit the Frog and Meet Miss Piggy 42. Make a huge difference in someone’s life 43. Pay a major blessing Forward 44. Grace the cover of a Romance Novel 45. Spend a nite as a homeless person and document 46. Visit all 50 states 47. Visit all continents 48. Host a show on MTV or VH1 49. Have a billboard in a major city with my face on it. 50. Learn to complete a flip on a circus trapzee.